


Unexpected

by Cookiechansenpai



Category: Free!
Genre: F/M, Haru is a sweetheart, It'll be disgustingly fluffy on the future chapters I'm telling you, Reader is sad af, Smut, slight angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2018-09-10 15:34:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8922700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cookiechansenpai/pseuds/Cookiechansenpai
Summary: "You don't always need another person to move on. But sometimes, it's the only way in order to forget about the pain; even for just a moment."





	1. Encounter

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. So this is my first take in trying to write smut, and I have to admit that I had a hard time writing this one. ORZ
> 
> Blame Taylor Swift and Zayn's "I Don't Wanna Live Forever" for this fic. That's the song that I was listening to when I came up with this story. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you guys would like this one. I don't see a lot of Haru-smut that's according to my taste so I decided that I had to have things done myself then. I had fun in creating this one though, despite the struggle that I had.

I went to this party just because my professor asked me to go on behalf of her. Despite my reluctance, and the fact that I don’t like going to parties no matter how fancy or unique they are, I still agreed to go. I needed something to distract me from the suffering that I was experiencing. How could I still feel like this? It’d been 3 years. I can’t forget about him. 

But when this mysterious, blue-eyed man approached me for a dance that evening, I found myself holding on to his hand and being led by him to where the rest of the couples are dancing. 

And I knew I was doomed the moment he leaned in to kiss me. 

I should’ve pushed him away. He was a stranger, after all. 

But I didn’t.

I wasn’t even sure of much else after he led me away from the crowd, to a huge and fancy room of the hotel. He didn’t even bother turning on the lights right after he locked the door, as he quickly turned to me and kissed me again. My eyes fluttered closed as I followed his lead, molding my own lips against his while wondering if he even cares about my lipstick getting smudged on his face as we continued to kiss. My fingers went up to his soft hair and tugged slightly to deepen the kiss. He held my body close as we moved closer to the king-sized bed. Without even cutting the kiss, he gently pushed me down, until my bare back felt the soft and silky sheets of the bed. It was only now, during this moment, when I’m lying on the bed, that he pulled away to let us catch our breath. The faint moonlight penetrating through the curtains was enough to make me see his disheveled hair, and the lipstick stains that I left on his face. His dark blue eyes stared at me intensely, that it made me gulp as I thought how sexy he looked right now because of that.

I muttered something under my breath-- a mere reaction as I appreciated how he looked like. And it seemed like he didn’t missed it, by the way his eyes widened. Eventually though, I think my words finally sank into him as he smiled and threaded his fingers through my hair. He leaned close, until our lips were only inches away.

“You’re.. beautiful,” he whispered to me, his warm breath leaving an unfamiliar sensation on my lips that left me wanting more. His low voice managed to send a pleasant shiver down my spine, making me ache for something more. 

I looped my arms around his neck to bring him close for another kiss. He hovered over me as he held my waist with his hand. I moaned slightly as I felt his tongue ask for entrance, and quickly granted him his request. Our tongues mingled and explored each other, but I soon let him dominate me which made me sigh in the kiss.  
The sounds that I was making seemed to have some kind of effect on him as well. With his other hand, he gently lifted my back off of the bed to unzip my dress. He tugged on it slowly, and let it fall down to the floor. Again, he pulled away to take in my appearance. I blushed at the intensity of his stare which made me consciously cover my breasts with my arm.

“Don’t. You’re gorgeous.” He held my wrist and pulled my arm away from my chest as he openly ogled my body. He pressed a kiss starting on my lips, trailing downwards to my cheek, nibbling softly on my jaw then settling on my neck which he softly bit, just to make me moan. I even heard him chuckle before he went lower to my collarbones. The way he breathed against my skin sparked a new kind of feeling swirling deep inside me, especially when he started to kiss and bite it gently. I sighed in pleasure while tugging on the strands of his hair, until I realized that he should start undressing as well. I pulled his hair harder when his bite became a bit harsh, and apparently, that made him very conscious as he suddenly pulled away with wide eyes.

“D-did I hurt you?” He asked and I found myself at loss for words as I let my fingers dance across my collarbone to feel the dents that his teeth had made. He mumbled an apology which made me giggle. I took hold of his slightly loosened tie and pulled him down harder. And while we were kissing each other again, my free hand started to slowly unbutton his shirt down to the last one. I opened my eyes and looked down to appreciate his toned body which he evidently achieved after years of hard training. My hand wandered down and touched the hard muscles of his chest and abdomen. He seemed to be very ticklish as he laughed in our kiss while I was feeling him. I pulled his shirt and coat down from his shoulders and he continued to reveal his sculpted body to me as he shrugged them off. I reached down to his pants and unbuttoned and zip it down. He let his pants and boxers join the other pile of clothes as he lazily kicked them off and climb over me on the bed.

“You’re still covered,” he told me as he pulled my panties down and flung it to where our other clothes were lying. Now fully exposed to each other, I couldn’t help but crave for more warmth and closeness from this man who was about to make love to me. 

“Tell me if it hurts. Please, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable,” He whispered in my ear as I nodded and felt him carefully push inside me. The moan that escaped from my lips was much louder than I’d like it to be, but I didn’t even care as of this moment. I blushed and looked at his reaction. He had his eyes closed in pleasure as he breathed deeply. He slowly entered deeper, and only opened his eyes when he’s finally reached his limit.

“Are you not hurt?” He threaded his fingers through my hair before placing the same hand on my cheek. I leaned on his touch and held it with my own.

“I’m fine, just continue.” Both of us didn’t even utter anything, aside from the occasional moans and sighs as he slowly moved in and out of me. He held my thighs, softly caressing it with his smooth palm, and had my legs wrap around his waist so he could go deeper. I moaned every time he’d hit that spot inside me and while he did his best to contain his own sounds for the past few moments, he found out that it was actually hard to do that now during the heat of the moment.

“P-please..” I cried as I started to feel like it was almost over. His breath sounded like it got caught in his throat, but I was too distracted to even notice as he went faster. He seemed to have read my mind and now, all of his energy was spent on repeatedly hitting that same spot, until I felt my release overcome me. I opened my eyes to look at him as my chest heavily rose and fell in an attempt to catch my breath. He was just as sweaty as I am, his dark fringe low over his eyes and sticking to his forehead. He held my hips as he continued thrusting, prolonging my climax until he finally reached the peak, himself, and collapsed on the bed next to me.

I was very sober as I refused to drink any kind of alcoholic drink earlier and I am painfully aware that no feelings are involved in one night stands. I turned my back on him and curled to the sheets, trying my best to calm down my breathing so I could already leave this room.

But I was surprised to feel his arms snaking around my bare waist, and it gave me courage to turn around and faced him. He smiled and pressed a kiss on both of my left and right eyelids as he uttered his thanks and closed his eyes. For a while, I felt my lips twitching up as I felt comfortable with him holding me like this. No one has ever treated me like this—not even him who became so in love with me, just as I was with him. This stranger made me feel loved, and I’m still glad that I got to experience such a blissful feeling, even though I knew that this will all be over the next day.


	2. Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When it all finally ended, he held her close in his arms. He watched the way she breathed deeply, her hair splayed across the white pillow case and how she snuggled closer to him for comfort. She smelled nice, reminding him of the flowers blooming in his late grandmother's garden every summer. She drove him crazy, made him feel unable to stop thinking about her, and he knew that he totally has to see her again.

Haru felt empty and cold the moment he woke up that morning. The body that previously occupied the other side of the bed was already gone. Her warmth was still lingering as he touched the spot, making him think that she might've only left a few minutes ago. Her scent was also still there, and if he hadn't opened his eyes, he might have thought that she's still lying there, sleeping beside him. 

He sighed as he stood up from bed, and noticed that all of his clothes, which were scattered all over the room from their activity last night, was now neatly folded and placed at his bedside table and he suddenly found himself smiling. He headed to the bathroom to take a quick shower. He usually prefers soaking himself in the tub, but this time, he didn't felt like it. Under the spray of the water, memories of what happened last night quickly came back to him. He shut his eyes, remembering the way her eyes showed off a somber look when he first saw her blending in through the crowd of people in the party. He didn't even know why he approached her in the first place; he just felt drawn to her for some reason. She was so beautiful, yet feeling out of place. He was sure that she was just as reluctant as he is to attend such a huge gathering. And when he finally got the courage to approach her and ask her for a dance, he felt a strange spark when he finally got to touch her hand as he asked her for a dance. 

And he felt like craving for more when they were finally at his suite, bare and naked for each other. He let his lips and hands gently roam all over her body, as if he was trying to memorize each and every part of her. He handled her as gently as possible, afraid of the fact that he might physically hurt her, in case he loses himself in the pleasure. When it all finally ended, he held her close in his arms. He watched the way she breathed deeply, her hair splayed across the white pillow case and how she snuggled closer to him for comfort. She smelled nice, reminding him of the flowers blooming in his late grandmother's garden every summer. She drove him crazy, made him feel unable to stop thinking about her, and he knew that he to totally has to see her again. 

**

"Okay, seriously? Where have you been?" My friend nagged over the phone as I entered the premises of my apartment. I yawned and kicked off the heels that have been torturing me since last night at the party.

"Are you just gonna ignore me or what?" She said again, bringing me out of my stupor. 

"Ah.. yes.. Sorry," I tiredly muttered, stripping off my dress along the way and stopping by the mirror as I noticed the bruises littered all over my neck and collarbones. I quietly slapped my free hand over my forehead, feeling embarrassed for a while. It made me seriously wonder just how many people might’ve seen them while I was on the way.  
"It's not so you to stay out so late at parties, especially that you don't enjoy attending them!" I understand that she was just being worried about me, but I couldn't help but feel annoyed at her voice right now. I was tired, my muscles were aching and I was still slightly sore from what happened between me and that blue-eyed man last night.

Despite it being a one-night stand, I couldn't help but feel.. confused, as to why he was handling me gently. I didn't even know him, and I was fairly certain that he didn't know me either. It was our first time meeting each other, but he treated me like he knew just how much I needed. 

"I'm really coming over if you don't plan answering me over this call," She already hang up the moment my train of thought was cut. I felt my head throbbing as I entered the bathroom to wash off the stickiness of sweat clinging onto my skin. I jolted slightly when I ran my hand over my skin, remembering the way he did it with his own hands and lips. No one has ever treated me with the same gentleness before. I could even remember the last relationship that I've been in-- but then again, it's not like I had another relationship before that anyway. 

I really thought he was the one for me. We were perfect, or so as what other people said. But after a year, our relationship fell apart all of the sudden. I was left alone, and he didn't even left any explanation why he suddenly decided to end what we had. 

Since then, I lost my faith in relationships. I didn't even dared seeing anyone anymore after my heartbreak, 3 years ago. I became too afraid to let my heart break again, because it felt like I couldn’t trust anyone enough to give it to once again, so I started building walls around me to keep it safe.  
As I finished taking a bath and wearing a fresh set of clothes, I let my tired body collapse on my soft bed, without even caring to pick up the mess that I’ve made. I was too exhausted to think about anything else, aside from that guy. His image lingered in my mind no matter what I do.  
And he was the only thing that ever haunted my dreams as I slowly drift off to sleep.

**  
I was surprised to wake up at the sound of someone ringing my doorbell. It was already dark, which kind of shocked me to learn that I’ve almost slept for 6 hours straight since I got home from the party. I tiredly went to the door and opened it to see my best friend with a frown on her face.  
“I’ve been here for an hour already,” She said, clearly frustrated as she walked past through me to enter my apartment. I followed after her and she sat down on the couch, crossing her arms and legs and looking at me seriously.  
“You could start telling me what happened now,” She added and I sighed. I really was avoiding her on purpose because I know that she’d push me to tell her what happened. I blushed as I start to think where I’m going to begin. I really didn’t like talking about such things, but I know that I really had no choice but to tell her.


	3. 4 Months

“Is it all finally set for the event?” A co-worker asked as he entered the office and checked all the wires and connections needed for the event later. I replied by nodding my head and giving him a thumbs up, to which he returned with a smile before leaving. I sighed and brought the cup of coffee to my lips, continuing to tap on my laptop to keep myself distracted. 

"I'll go set up the screens now, okay?" He said and left the office. 

It’d been 4 months since that encounter, yet I’m still having a hard time forgetting about him. He’s been haunting my dreams, the memories of our night together flashing back— his deep blue eyes, low voice and the way he kissed and touched me still lingering in my mind.  
I slapped my cheeks for a few times to get myself back into focus. I brought my gaze back to the laptop and—who am I even kidding? I’m already finished with my work.  
I sighed again and stood up from my seat to leave the office. I need to get another cup of coffee and possibly take a glimpse of the event that was to be held in the campus today.  
I don’t know a lot of details, but I heard that our University’s athletes will be receiving a warm homecoming for participating in the Olympics. Our University is very well-known for producing the best athletes across Japan and whether they brought home achievements or not, they all still deserved a warm welcome from their alma mater. They’d went through a lot of hardships, after all, and I’m sure that being able to participate in such prestigious sporting event is already an honor for them as athletes. 

There was already a huge amount of crowd gathering around the campus when I went out and got my coffee. Female students are happily chatting and giggling about their athlete crushes and about how happy they are that they could finally see them in person. I leaned against one of the main entrance’s pillar, watching everyone from a distance when the marching band finally started to play. A group of people with familiar white and red jersey were waving at the crowd who was happily cheering them on. Around their necks were their medals hanging proudly. Some of them wore one, two or even three or more and I can’t help but feel amazed that some people could actually really do that.  
My eyes locked on a particularly tall guy with a gold medal hanging around his neck, my eyes trailed upwards and suddenly, a shiver ran down my spine and I felt like I was rooted in my place. Familiar black hair, eyes as clear as the ocean and a nonchalant expression. It was all the same as the one that I saw at the party. 

It was him.

I almost spat out my coffee in surprise. 

My gaze were set on him and no matter what I do, I couldn’t tear my eyes off of him. He still looked like when we first met. Nothing changed so much, except for the dark circles underneath his eyes. He looked like he’s tired and stressed over something, but that might be because he just finished participating in his event in the Olympics. I never even knew that he was an athlete. 

Just before I could tell myself to go back to my office, our gazes suddenly locked and his straight face turned into one that I could only describe as the same reaction as mine. His mouth hang open and close in a silent question but I wasn’t able to witness just what he did afterwards as I already ran back to my office. My heart was beating so fast, I was scared that it might jump out of my chest, my head spinning, confused and wondering why I’m being like this. It wasn’t like he’s any special person or whatever. He’s just a stranger whom I happened to have spent the night with. 

“Wait, please!” I felt someone tug at my arm, stopping me in my tracks. Without even turning, I knew that it was him. His voice was just like the breathy moans and whispers from that night and the warmth that I’m feeling right now as he held my arm is totally the same as that one when he was running his hands all over me. 

“I-I have to know your n—“ 

“There you are! I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” I silently thanked the heavens as the same co-worker from before saw me and I finally had an excuse to pull my arm away from his grip. I approached him and forced a smile, acting like everything is normal before going after him, leaving that guy standing there as he watched us leave the scene. 

**  
Haru stood there in shock as he watched the girl leave him standing there. After 4 months of searching and sleepless nights as he thought about her endlessly, he finally saw her and he couldn’t believe that she just ignored him like that. 

“Hey, Nanase! Where do you think you’re going?” A teammate of his approached him and playfully slapped his back. He deadpanned and rubbed his back gently to soothe the pain.

“Who’s that small babe? A fling of yours?” At this point, Haru was starting to get annoyed as he ignored the way his teammate was laughing. He was obviously making fun of him and Haru is obviously not okay with it.

“And ooh~ You’ve got taste, you know? She’s not really the hot kind of chick, but she’s really cute and—look at her ass,” He wolf-whistled and threw his arm around Haru as he stared at the fleeing female’s figure until she finally disappeared in the crowd. “Mind sharing her with me?” 

“Shut up,” An annoyed Haru muttered his breath and he was all ready to teach his teammate a lesson if only their manager didn’t suddenly catch up with them. 

“Nanase, Fujimoto,” He called as he panted and tried to catch his breath. “Why did you two suddenly ran off?” 

“Well you see Nanase suddenly took an interest in this cute chick and went after her and like a nice and responsible teammate that I always am, I followed him to make sure that he doesn’t get to keep that cutie all to himself!” 

“Fujimoto!” 

“What? What’s the problem with that?” 

“You know Nanase’s not that kind of guy,” The manager raised his voice slightly which effectively made Fujimoto from talking. Haru sighed and left the two as their manager continued to reprimand Fujimoto. He didn’t got to talk to her right now, but at least he finally has a lead that she’s actually working at the University. Chances are that she’s also a former student of this University and if that’s the case, he already knew whom he’s going to ask for some information.  
**  
“Alright, so why did you make me come here again?” Poki, my friend, asked as she propped her chin on her hand. I felt the familiar prickle of heat rush up to my face as I fidgeted and suddenly found it hard to tell her what just happened again. 

“Hey, hey.. If you continue acting like that, I wouldn’t know what’s up.”

“I know! Just let me piece things together,” I told her and ran a hand through my hair. I breathed in and out and tried calming myself down. 

“I saw him again..” Her eyes evidently widened as I started my story. She slammed her palms down the table and stood up from her seat. 

“YOUR ASSHOLE OF AN EX-BOYFRIEND!?” 

“NO! And please calm down,” I consciously looked around and saw that some of the eyes were trained towards us. I had to stand up and apologize to those that we disturbed. 

“I mean—I saw that guy.. from the party at the Uni again. He’s one of those athletes that were welcomed earlier,” My throat suddenly felt dry as I explained it to her. I took the glass of water and emptied all of its content in an instant. 

“Oh my gosh. Then what?” 

“I was so shocked that I ran.. a-and, he suddenly ran after me and stopped me!” 

“Yep. This is starting to sound like those cheesy romance films that we’ve seen,” She chuckled and encouraged me to continue. I rolled my eyes at her but nonetheless told her more.

“But then Koyuki-san appeared and he suddenly asked me for some help so I took got away from that guy’s grip and ran back to the office. If only you knew just how relieved I was that I got to escape.” I felt like all of my energy has been drained the moment I finished telling her what just happened. Now, I couldn’t take off the thought of his shocked expression when he saw me earlier. 

I wasn’t even really expecting that he’d still recognize me. I was just a stranger who happened to be really sad that night and let him do what he wanted so I could forget about my problems that evening. 

I never expected to get this attached to him and I know that I’m fucked up. 

“What are you girls talking about now, hmm?” Poki’s boyfriend, Rin, the guy with the magenta colored hair and sharp teeth, finally reappeared and sat beside his girlfriend. They shared a brief kiss before turning their attention to me again. 

“Wipe that frown away from your face. You remind me of one of my friends,” He laughed and took Poki’s hand. “Now what was happening again?” 

“Well, you know.. Girl problems. She still couldn’t move on from her ex.” They laughed together and I can’t help but feel like I’m being made fun of. I looked out of the window next to us to try and ignore them. 

“Now, don’t get all pouty because we’re saying this.. I know! Maybe you and Haru would get along very well! You’re very much like each other.” 

“Haru?” I raised my eyebrow as the name caught my attention. Why did that sound familiar again?

“Uh.. Yes. My friend. He’s also a swimmer like me and he participated in the Olympics too—and don’t worry about me setting you up with a bad-looking guy. A lot of girls are actually fawning over him, but he always looks uninterested.” He chuckled and continued to describe his friend. I was glad that the waiter finally came with our food and I’d finally have a reason to just shut up and listen to their story while they get adorable and lovey-dovey in front of me occasionally. I almost had the urge to roll my eyes at them whenever they’d show just how in-love they are, but at the same time, I can’t help but feel happy for them. I may not have that happy romantic relationship that I was dreaming of since I was young, but at least I get to see my friend become really happy because she managed to find a very nice and handsome boyfriend.

I hope I’d find one soon too, for myself. 

Maybe I should give Rin’s suggestion a shot.  
**  
The next day, I went out early for work as Kawaguchi-sensei was asking me to come to her office as soon as I could. There’s an important job that I have to do, according to her, and it’s something that I couldn’t turn down again. 

I knocked three times on the door of her office before entering. 

“Kawaguchi-sensei, I—“ My voice seemed to have gotten caught in my throat as I turned my head to see who her guest was. His dark hair and familiar ocean-blue eyes stared back at me and I suddenly found it hard to breathe. 

“Nanase-kun here wants to speak with you,” She tapped on her phone and giggled as she looked at me. “Why didn’t you told me before that you knew him? He used to be one of my students from the afternoon Math class.” Kawaguchi-sensei stood up from her seat and headed for the door, taking one last look at the two of us.

“Oh, please don’t have sex here in my office, mmkay? Oh! And please stay safe!” 

“Shut up!” She laughed and closed the door behind her. I rubbed my temples and wondered again just how on earth did I even became close with this former Math professor of mine.

The two of us were left all alone in the office, the silence between us becoming thicker as the seconds passed. I don’t have the guts to turn back and face him for some reason. Why would I even face him? I don’t even know him. We don’t even have anything to settle between the two of us! 

So why is he here right now? 

Why did he even bothered calling for me?


	4. Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She wasn’t really that special, but Haru found himself staring at her every time she’d pass by. She probably never noticed him though, due to her being always pre-occupied and dreaming away in her very own world.

He didn’t even knew that she was ‘that’ girl, from his College days, until his former Math professor told him so when he went to see her. Well, she isn’t really the eye-catching type of girl way back. If anything, she’s actually the type of person whom you’d not notice even when she’s standing in the same room with you. She’s just that quiet and introverted girl who prefers to stay at home alone, rather than to go to wild parties and dance until the early hours of dawn. She hated mingling with crowds and she only had one friend whom she always talked to. 

She wasn’t really that special, but Haru found himself staring at her every time she’d pass by. She probably never noticed him though, due to her being always pre-occupied and dreaming away in her very own world. 

And that seemed to be the case as she looked at him. When he brought his piercing blue eyes to meet her gaze, she quickly averted them. 

“What do you want?” She muttered under her breath. Her tone was soft, but he didn’t miss it. He took a step closer to her, feeling his heart pound against his chest. 

“I-I wanted to see you again,” Just as he was about to touch her arm, she was fast to avoid him and took a step back away from him. Haru did the same, startled by her sudden reaction.  
“I wanted to talk to you,” He said once more, trying to maintain the distance between them this time. 

“There’s nothing that we have to talk about. You should be forgetting about everything that happened between the two of us. One night stands don’t involve feelings right? We’re both strangers to each other who coincidentally also happened to be from the same University, and that’s it. Now, can I leave please? I still have a lot of work to do” She sighed and rubbed her temples as she turned her back on him. She was ready to leave and Haru felt even more disappointment than what he felt when he realized that his fridge is out of mackerel.

“Anyway. I have a lot of work to do so please don’t disturb me.” She stepped out of the room and closed the door behind her. Completely ignoring the weird feeling stirring in her chest as she walked away from the office where the black-haired man was left alone.

**

“Are you okay?” Koyuki-san asked as he noticed the stiffness of my posture while I worked in front of the computer. I looked back at him, forcing a smile and nodding to give a positive response. 

“Well, right now, you looked like you just rose from the dead. In any case that you needed some help, you can always call me!” He gave me a thumbs up, like usual, and left, making me smile as I brought my eyes back to work. However, that smile left my lips immediately when the image of that guy re-appeared in my mind. I stopped from typing as I’ve decided that now was the perfect time to take a break. I rubbed my temples, as if it was going to help in making the memories of him go away. 

“Why the hell is that guy even looking for me?” I mumbled to herself, chuckling dryly all of the sudden as I thought about how ridiculous that was. 

“He’s probably sick in the head that’s why,” I said once again, answering my own question and taking a sip of my coffee. I repeatedly and quietly muttered those words to convince myself that that’s the actual reason why he’s looking for me. But I remembered just how his blue eyes looked so sincere while he was standing in front of me earlier. I could tell. It’s totally different from the last time I saw him.

I took the mug away from my lips, feeling a bitter taste which I knew wasn’t from the coffee that I was drinking. 

_“I love you.”_

_“I would never leave you.”_

_“I want to be with you forever.”_

_I felt tears prickle at the corner of my eyes as I heard his soothing voice in my head. I remembered just how he used those hands to push away some hair behind my ear. I never liked it when someone would try to invade my personal space, but he was an exemption. I loved it whenever he’d pull me close to cuddle and whenever he’d use the same hands to cup my cheeks as he lovingly press kisses on my lips._

_I loved him so much—even more than how I love myself. How could he suddenly leave me? Wasn’t I enough? Where did I possibly go wrong?_

_Even if he just left and come crawling back to me, I was ready to forgive him. I was always there to welcome him back into my life, but he didn’t. I could even remember the last conversation that we had before I started my final year in College. It was also the last time that I saw him._

_“I-I swear, Touma! I forgive you! Even if you don’t say that you’re sorry! I love you, I love you so much please..” I held his jacket tight as I cried and pleaded to make him come back to me. I pressed my face against his back, sobbing and thinking about how I wanted to feel him embrace me once again. I could never live without his warm hugs—it was the only thing that could soothe my mind whenever I’d feel all the negative feelings starting to take over me._

_But unlike what I was expecting, I only felt his hands pull mine away from gripping his clothes. He stared down at me without that loving look that he used to always give me._

_“I said I don’t want you anymore,” His voice was cold, empty. Unlike the usual one which is always warm and full of life. My eyes were wide, red and puffy as I left me all alone, standing in the middle of the road without saying anything more._

The ringing of the telephone brought me out of my reminiscence, and it was only then when I realized that I was already crying. I used the back of my hand to dry my tears as I picked up the phone.

“Network office. May I help you?” I did my best to make my voice sound as clear as possible as I spoke with the person on the other line. The caller was a female, and she was speaking in a very soft tone. 

“YO! It’s Koyuki. Look, I know I’ve been offering you some help in case you needed it since you arrived this morning, but it turns out that I’m actually the one who’d be needing your help. Crazy, right?” Koyuki-san chuckled from the other line, and I couldn’t help but laugh as well despite crying only a few minutes ago. 

“Alright. Where are you and do I have to bring anything?” I asked as I took out my pocket mirror and made sure that my face was clear from any sign of crying.  
“Yep! Bring my toolbox to the University pool right now. You’re really a lifesaver!” He cheerfully said and after we said our goodbyes, I hang up on the call and headed to the pool immediately, along with the tools that he was asking for. From the office, it will take a person about 20 minutes to arrive at the pool when they’re walking at a normal pace. Koyuki-san’s toolbox is quite heavy, so I came there later than my expected time of arrival. 

“Ah, thanks for bringing this! You’re really a lifesaver!” He laughed and opened the box to start fixing the digital scoreboard. Despite being the same field of work, Koyuki-san and I actually differed in our expertise—he’s more of a hardware and computer expert, while my job is all about managing networks and fixing the connections in the University. We always had each other’s back whenever we’re having a hard time with what we’re doing, and that’s actually how our friendship started. 

“Ah.. it’s not displaying the right time and ranking like how it should.. Maybe it has something to do with this..” He muttered to himself as I watched him and handed him the tools that he was asking for. While trying to focus and remember what he was muttering, the sound of the water splashing as another swimmer dove in the pool caught my attention. As if on impulse, I turned my head towards the pool, just in time to see the black-haired guy from earlier put his swim cap and goggles on. He prepared himself on the starting block as he waited for his coach’s signal. 

And I felt mesmerized and captivated to the way he dived in at the sound of the whistle. His form was perfect, and the way his body entered the water was so smooth that it seemed like he was one with the water. Not only that, but the way he also swam was something. He’s a fast swimmer. I can’t put it to words, but he was really amazing that I was left staring at him even when he finally finished his lap and pulled his cap and goggles off. He panted, catching his breath as droplets of water dripped down from his hair to his face. He pulled himself out of the pool and headed somewhere. 

“Hey, hey! Are you even listening?” I snapped my head back to Koyuki-san who seemed to be already finished with his work. “It’s finally working. But I think you have a loose screw in your head.” He followed where I was gazing earlier, and a smirk suddenly formed on his lips. 

“Ah, I see that you’re crushing on Nanase..” He laughed and I playfully smacked his arm. He pouted and rubbed his arm soothingly as he looked at me. “I was just joking, you know? Why do you have to punch me?” 

“Because people like you should stay out of other people’s business,” I deadpanned and crossed my arms. “Besides, I don’t even know that Nanase guy.” I lied and I don’t know if it’s just me, but he looked like he wasn’t convinced with what I said. I quickly switched my gaze to something else to prevent him from seeing through my lie. 

 

30 minutes later and I’m finally back at my office. A new pile of work was given to me, much to my relief because at last, I finally have something to distract myself from my unnecessary thoughts of him. I fixed everything that I have to fix until in the late afternoon, when the sun is finally setting. I stretched my arms up and leaned against my chair. My phone suddenly rang and Poki’s Caller ID flashed on the screen. 

“Yo,” I picked it up and answered her call. 

“Hey! Done with work? Let’s eat here at the new seafood restaurant nearby!” She said and I scribbled a few more things in my notepad before I neatly kept it in one of my folders.

“Sure. I’ll be out in a few minutes. Are you there already?” 

“Yep! Rin’s here too! Along with his friend, Haru! Just come here already, okay? I’m so excited to get you guys to know each other! He’s such a hot guy!” I could hear Rin complaining in jealousy and Poki laughing as she teased him from the other line which made me roll my eyes. 

“Okay, okay sheesh don’t whine like a kid, Rin! Anyway, I’ll see you later okay? Bye~” She said and hung up on the call. I packed my stuff back in my bag and walked towards the door to leave the office. I locked it with my spare key and started heading my way out of the University. The new restaurant that she was talking about is only a few steps away from the University, so it didn’t took me long when I finally got there. 

“Hey! Over here!” Poki waved her hand, catching my attention. Rin was sitting next to her, and another person with a seemingly-familiar head of black hair was sitting in the chair from across them. Both of our eyes widened upon meeting as soon as he turned his head to look at the person that his friend’s girlfriend is calling. 

“Y-You? You’re Haru?!”


	5. Surprises

“Y-You!? You’re Haru!?” I blurt out in surprise as the blue-eyed man blink repeatedly, obviously confused by my sudden outburst. I turn my head to look at Rin and Poki, slapping my forehead as an idea pops in my head. 

“I can’t believe you two set me up!” I told them, still somewhat frenzied and angry, feeling slightly betrayed. The couple exchanged looks, their faces expressing confusion as Poki looked back at me. 

I shook my head and I come closer to grip his arm and he looks at me, expressing pure confusion in his face. 

“You and me. We’re gonna talk. NOW.” I pulled him somewhere in the back of the restaurant to make sure that no one sees us when I talk to him. I can’t believe this guy even has the nerve to ask my friend and her boyfriend-- which were also coincidentally his friends-- just so he could see me again. Just the mere thought of it makes my blood boil in anger. 

“Alright. Explain right now why you are even here!” I crossed my arms as I tapped my foot on the wooden floor while waiting for his response. He blinked a few times at me, still looking confused as he tilts his head. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t fucking lie to me..” I practically growled and he raised his hands in defense. “You even have the nerve to ask Kawaguchi-sensei for my personal information and had her set me up so we would meet again. And now you’re expecting me to believe that you’re saying the truth?” I gritted my teeth as I try to stare him down, to squeeze out the truth of him. Strangely, his eyes only reflected off something which is complete innocence, taking me back slightly as he seemed like he didn’t really did anything this time. 

“I swear, I don’t know what you’re talking about..” 

“I said—“ 

“Haru’s right. He didn’t knew anything about this, and neither did we..” I turned around at the familiar voice and saw Rin standing there, sighing as he runs his fingers through his hair. All of the sudden, I felt like I paled at the realization and almost facepalmed myself for skipping to conclusions. Oh God. This is embarrassing. 

“W-Whatever.. just.. ugh” I groaned and blushed in embarrassment as I walked past through Rin, even hearing him telling me to head to the table that they reserved for all of us-- maybe in case I was thinking of ditching them, even though that thought didn’t even cross my mind. Just, what in the hell is happening? And why do I have to see this guy for the third time this day? 

As soon as I am back, Poki gave me a worried look as she held my hands when I sat down on the seat across her. 

“Is there some kind of problem? W-was there something wrong with Haru? I’m so sorry.. we didn’t had any idea that he might have problems with you..” I smiled at her concern as I shook my head slowly in response and squeezed her hand back to reassure her. 

“I’m okay. Relax.” I smiled and we both turned our head when Rin and Nanase finally got back to our table. The couple smiled at each other and Rin sits down next to Poki, while this guy called ‘Haru’ sits down next to me and I did my best to not look into his eyes while the couple awkwardly tries to break the silence by starting a conversation and making us engage into it. So far, the questions that they were throwing to me are easily answered by a mere ‘yes’ or ‘no’ which gives me some time to space off and think about other things that are way more important than this dinner date that I’ve been dragged into.

Thankfully, our dinner finally arrived, giving me a good excuse why I couldn’t and do not reply to most of their questions for me. I ate my food as slowly as possible, to prevent them from trying to involved me in a conversation, as they both knew how annoyed I can get whenever someone would try to interrupt my meal by talking to me. 

After eating, the couple decided to stay longer, much to my horror. And of course, they never let go of me no matter how much I asked them, and no matter how I reasoned out. Poki always sees through my lies. 

The clock strikes 8 and I keep myself busy with my phone as I answered and read emails and playing an app afterwards. This Haru person next to me doesn’t seem interested in the conversation that they were trying to make us engage into as well as he plays with his phone as well. A host appears in the tiny stage of the restaurant and lets everyone in the restaurant know that a pianist and a violinist will be up on stage in a few minutes to perform, and that anyone who’d want to dance is welcome to do so. Rin stands up and offers his hand to Poki. 

“Can I have this dance with you, my lady?” He smiles and kisses the back of her hand as she takes his and lets him pull her to her feet. Poki winks at me before they leave and the musician starts to play romantic instrumentals. I—along with Nanase, were both left alone at the table as I watch almost everyone in the restaurant stand up and dance with their own respective partners. I placed my elbow over the table and leaned my cheek against my palm as I sigh heavily and eventually hid my face with the same palm. While contemplating my life and thinking about how I should’ve been at home now, relaxing in my own solitude, if I didn’t agree to go here, I suddenly felt something poking me arm. I looked up and saw Nanase staring at me with innocent blue eyes and he blinks as he keeps pushing the tiny piece of folded paper to me. I looked at it, then back at his face, before deciding to take it and read what’s written inside.

Want to dance? The letter says and a tiny dolphin was drawn next to it. I deadpanned and took a pen from my bag to write my reply, and add a harpoon impaling the dolphin, along with a tiny, angry fisherman. I passed the paper to him, causing a tiny smile to appear on his face, only for it to quickly disappear as fast as it appeared as he reads my reply. 

No. 

And just when I thought that he’d stop as there, he didn’t. 

He sent another message, and the curious, little me is actually interested to see what he just wrote again. This time, a tiny sad Iwatobi-chan was drawn next to the dolphin and the new message that he wrote. 

You looked so sad.. even back at the hotel before. 

That’s none of your business, okay? I wrote back and drew an angry chibi holding a gun. It seems like, this time, he finally got the courage to talk to me as the paper got filled with our tiny exchange of message and doodles. 

”I’m sorry..” He says, slightly startling me as I wasn’t expecting him to say that, primarily, because there’s actually no reason for him to ask for an apology. 

“There’s nothing that you have to apologize for.. It was just—that was a.. a mean to release some stress and negative emotions.. nothing more. I actually had to thank you because I forgot about what I was stressing over for a few hours because of you.” 

“Well.. what were you stressing about?” Why is he so interested in me? Why is he asking so much questions? Why does he even want to see me so badly that he has to ask someone for my personal information? He isn’t even familiar to me, even though we came from the same University. 

“That’s too personal.. You can’t just ask stuff like that.” I buried my face in my arms as I crossed it over the table, feeling tired and lonely all of the sudden again. What I wasn’t expecting was for him to not insist asking as he just went silent. I raised my head and saw him watching the couples happily dance along the music with a sad expression in his eyes. I suddenly felt guilt tugging at my heart for some reason. It felt like I’ve been too mean towards him and now he’s sad—but why would he be sad? 

I ignored that strange feeling at first, but as time passes, the feeling became strangely unbearable. I rummaged through my bag and took some colored sticky notes and doodled some stuff in it. 

Don’t be sad I drew a happy tiny person that resembles me and passed it to him. His eyes, once again, widens as he looks at it and he picks it up before staring at me.. and then looking back at the paper again to write something. 

I’m not. Don’t worry. I’m just really like this. He writes, along with a tiny person that resembles him. This managed to make me blush slightly and chuckle softly as I write a response. 

Don’t act like we’re friends, okay? We’re just people who knew each other casually. Period. That sounded definitely cold, but I want to clear out whatever we have, in case he’s actually expecting that we can be close. He pouts immediately, his smile disappearing as he reads it and a tiny giggle accidentally left my lips at his cute expression. He looks back at me in surprised, and then smiled again as he finished writing in the paper. 

You look cute when you smile. And your laughter is adorable. He says, which instantly turns my face a deeper red as I read it. 

“Seems like you two are having fun!” I looked up at Rin and saw him and Poki grinning like crazy hyenas and I glared at both of them. 

“We’re not..” I replied, and the couple only laughed.

“Anyway.. We’re leaving now, so Haru, it’s all up to you to walk her back to her apartment!” Rin suggested, making him laugh as I violently reacted against his request. Nanase nodded in agreement of course, still with that straight look on his face. 

“Please take care of him, Haru!~ We’ll go ahead~” 

“GUYS! OH MY GOD, WAIT FOR ME PLEASE!?” I dramatically stretched my arms out to them, crying slightly as they left and never even listened to my plea. I looked back at him and he just shrugs as he stands up. 

“You have work tomorrow, Right? Let’s get going,” Reluctantly, I stood up and followed him as I sigh and we left the restaurant together. 

My apartment is not even that far from the restaurant. It only takes me about 20 minutes of walking back and forth; from my house to the University. I rubbed my arm with my other hand as I felt the cold spring breeze in my skin, slightly regretting the fact that I left my thick coat back at home just because I was too lazy to bring it. He must have noticed my discomfort as he looks at me with a concerned look on his face. 

“Are you cold?” He asks. A minute of silence lingered between the two of us, with the cold breeze which made me hug myself tighter. 

“No. Don’t come any closer.” I told him, looking away as we continue to walk in silence. I heard him sigh, and was surprised when he suddenly moves closer to me to drape his warm and soft coat over my shoulders. 

“Keep it. And throw it away if you want.. It’s okay.” He says as he looks away, a tiny tint of pink shading his cheeks as I look at him. “If it’s too much effort for you.. I’m not gonna ask you to return it to me. You can either keep it or burn it.. whatever you want to do with it.” 

We were silent during the whole walk to the apartment, with only the sound of each step we take on the concrete road filling my hearing. The silence was so loud, that it felt almost deafening, so I was very relieve when we finally reached the apartment complex’s gate. I turned to look at him with a serious expression on my face, finally daring to stare up straight at him and meeting his curious, blue gaze. 

“I’ll repay your kindness. I don’t like indebting people.” 

“You don’t have to,” is almost his immediate response to what I said. I shook my head and furrowed my brows at him. 

“Like I said, I don’t like indebting people. I’m gonna repay you, no matter what and I won’t accept no as an answer.” I sighed and then finally turned and waved my hand at him before he can even refuse. I went inside the building and entered the elevator, pressing the corresponding button to bring me to my floor. From that moment, I couldn’t stop thinking about him, even as I finally washed myself and went to bed. He was still in my dreams. 

**

A few weeks have passed since we all had dinner at that seafood restaurant all together and I am sure that something has changed between the way Nanase and I interact with each other. It all started with the next day after he walked me to my apartment. The previous night, I immediately threw his coat in my washing machine and dried it so I can return it as soon as possible. While carefully putting it in a neat paper bag the next morning, I’ve decided to throw in a tiny bento box in appreciation for his kindness. When I met him at the University’s pool that day, I handed it to him immediately and then fled the scene, avoiding him in purpose to prevent him from trying to start a conversation.  
The day after that, I saw a cup of my favorite coffee on my desk. I looked at Koyuki-kun and told him that it wasn’t him who was responsible for that. I picked up the note sticking to the cup, only to frown as I recognized the doodle and handwriting as the same as Nanase’s. I sighed and rubbed my temples, but I still drank to coffee. 

It was one of the most delicious coffees that I have tasted. 

And because I didn’t want to indebt him, I prepared another gift for him in gratitude for the coffee.. until it just happened that we just ended up like exchanging gifts and slowly became somewhat friends. I’ve even started to call him by his first name, as he was insistent about it. He wanted me to call him “Haru”, but he seemed annoyed when I accidentally called him “Haruka” that’s why I settled for that nickname. 

“Haruka!” I could see his eye twitch as I waved and approached him with a small smile on my face. Despite his annoyance with how I call him, he smiled and looked at me.

“Why? What’s wrong?” I shook my head and looked up at him. 

“Nothing. I was having a good day. Also, the volleyball team were coming back today and we’re also preparing the media systems for the homecoming.” 

He smiles and then raises his brows as he looks at me. “So that’s why your bags are extremely dark today, look at you..” He holds my face, to my surprise, his thumb brushing over the skin beneath my eyes and I slapped it away playfully while giggling. 

“Aw gosh.. I appreciate the concern but I have to work hard.. Oh! I think they’re here!” The marching band starts playing their music as the athletes enter the University grounds. Every female staff and student squeals loudly at the sight of their handsome idols up close and in real life. 

“Hey!” I heard someone calling my name, making me turn my head towards his direction. The smile on my face was immediately wiped away as I see who was running towards me, his familiar voice, hair and face making my whole being shake as I remember the exact moment he said those words that have once destroyed me. 

“Touma-kun..”


	6. AUTHOR'S NOTE (PLEASE READ)

Hey! So some of you might be wondering where the hell am I and when I'm going to update this fic. Don't worry guys, **I'M NOT DROPPING THIS FIC.** I plan on finishing it as it'll be ended soon in a few more chapters (few as in, only 2-3 chapters to go). As of the moment, I'm just very busy with life and school, so I'm not always in front of my laptop to try and finish the fic, plus, I have some writer's block sometimes and I need to stop and relax my mind first before I could proceed in writing something that will make sense. 

Hopefully, you guys would wait and stay until the very end of this fic. Comments and Kudos are highly appreciated! It inspires us writers and motivates us to continue writing. 

Again, thank you for everyone's support. I'll be holding on to my promise to finish this fic even if no one reads this anymore.


	7. Second Chances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I hope you could take me back into your life.. I couldn’t find real happiness despite having everything that I want.. Please..” He begs and I was suddenly at loss for words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Sorry for the very, extremely late update of this fic. I made sure to make this chapter quite long to make up to the very slow update progress of this fic. By the way, this fic will only have about 1 or 2 more chapters so stay tuned because this is almost ending! There'll be more Haru in the next chapter, by the way. This one is more on 'reader-centric' so there isn't much about him ^^; 
> 
> Enjoy!

“Touma..” My voice was low when I muttered his name under my breath. My eyes were as wide as saucers when he runs towards me. Once he was in front of me, he raises his hand up in greeting with that same old smile that made me fall for him before. 

“Yo! It’s been so long! How are you?” I clenched my fist as I stare at him, gritting my teeth as I ask myself why he was acting like a break up didn’t occur between the two of us. Tears threatened to spill out of my eyes, but I did my best to not let them spill out, even biting my bottom lip to prevent it from quivering. 

“U-Uh.. yeah.. Hi.” Is all I managed to say as I dared to look at him, still looking as handsome as before like he’d never change. Meanwhile, here I am, as wasted as I was before especially that I saw him now again. 

“Hey, are you okay? You look like—“ 

“Excuse us. She still has something to do..” To my surprise, Haru suddenly grabs my arm and lead me inside the University building, dragging me back to the office and then shutting the door behind us. He turns to face me with a serious look on his face.

“You didn’t looked okay back there..” he said as I head to my chair silently and turned my computer on, waiting for it to start up while looking through my printed documents, even though I know that all of the work that I have to do are already finished, just to block out any thought of him. 

“Is that your ex-boyfriend?” My gaze goes up to meet his serious blue ones, surprised for a moment as to how he even knew about that. He sighs as he seemingly read what was on my mind—a habit of his that he always does whenever he tries to read my mind and figures out that I am troubled, “I heard from Poki.” 

“So she told you.. God, thank you. At least you wouldn’t be confused..” I leaned back against my chair and looked up at the ceiling in order to prevent my tears from falling. “It’s just fucking unfair how he acts normally just right after he left me just like that.. How he told me that he didn’t want me anymore, like I was just some piece of trash that he can discard anytime..” I paused at that moment as my voice threatens to break. I covered my eyes with my forearms as a long exasperated exhale leaves me lips. 

“Why don’t you ask him now, then..” I groaned at his response as I removed my arms from my eyes and faced him once again. 

“And do you think it’ll be that easy..?” I sigh heavily once more as I turn my attention to my computer. “Anyway, don’t you have practice today? You should be at the pool right now.. And I also have some work to do.” 

He nods and then stands up from the small sofa he was sitting on. He puts one of his hands inside his hoodie’s pockets as he takes out a tiny cat phone strap on my desk before leaving. 

“You know where to find me if you need me.” And he was gone right after saying that. I groaned in frustration again as I slam my face on my desk after realizing that I finished all of the work that I have to do earlier. 

“Who am I kidding?” 

**

It was already sunset by the time I finished my shift for the day. I left my office and started walking towards the campus gate, passing by the University gymnasium while on my way. Curiosity gets the better of me, for some reason, as I dared to take a peek due to all the noises coming from inside. My eyes immediately spots Touma as he receives the ball from the University’s volleyball team as he flawlessly moved around and effortlessly gained a score for his team. His teammates gathered around him and clapped him on the back, praising him for doing such a great job. 

The way he laughs and rejoices with his teammates made a smile find its way to my lips as I reminisce the wonderful times of sitting there in the bleachers and shouting his name to cheer him on during his games. 

..

I really shouldn’t think about that. 

A few tears came out of my eyes as I walk away and wipe them with the back of my hand. I wanted to be back home, to be able to pour out all of the emotions that I’ve bottled up alone. I don’t want anyone to ever see me. I don’t want them to worry why I was tearing up. I don’t want to be a burden to anyone by showing them my weakness.

“Hey, wait!” A familiar voice calls my name as I continue to walk away, feeling a strong grip on my wrist as he finally manages to catch up to me. I turned to face him, my eyes wide in surprise as Touma stands there smiling and looking at me. 

“You’re crying? You have tears on your eyes..” He frowns as he reaches over and wipes the tears away with his thumb. “Why?”

I stared at him in disbelief, actually tempted to knee him as he asks such a stupid question. Is he for real? This person—who left me years ago simply because he said that he didn’t want me anymore—is asking why I’m crying?

Is he an idiot? 

But just before I was able to put those thoughts to words, his face expressed realization all of a sudden and he releases my arm.

“Right,” he sighs heavily and bows all of the sudden. “I am so sorry.. for everything. I’ve been a bad boyfriend to you before. I always let you down, and I even stood you up a lot of times already, then just suddenly left you like that.. especially when you needed me the most,” He sighs as he looks up at me again. “I hope you can forgive me. I want to start over again and be friends with you.” He offers a smile as he stretches his hand to me, expecting me to take it and show him that we’re finally okay. Despite that, I simply stared at him, dumbfounded at the sudden transition of events. My eyes trails down to his hand—which was still stretched out to me—and I suddenly feel my heart beating fast, and heat strangely rising up to my cheeks.

“Uh.. right,” His words snaps me out of my thoughts as he speaks once more. He was blushing slightly as he rubs the back of his neck, looking away as he averts his gaze from mine. “It’s totally not that easy to start again.” 

Those words shocked me once more. Despite acknowledging his mistakes, he’s also now considering what I must have felt during and after we broke up.  
But what should I do now? 

What if he’s just trying to trick me so he could hurt me again?

“I have to admit, I did missed you.. a lot. And I wouldn’t even force you to be okay with being friends.. I just felt like I have to apologize because I realized just how much of a jerk I was back then.” He confesses as he takes his hand back, but placed it over my head to ruffle my hair—a habit of his that he used to always do when he’s praising me, or when he’s trying to tell me that everything’s going to be alright. 

“I’ll go now, okay? Thank you for your time..” He says softly before turning and then walking back to the gym. I didn’t even know what’s gotten in me. It’s as if my body has its own mind that I suddenly followed him and tugged on the hem of his shirt. He faces me once more, looking at me as he calls me by my name. I raised my head up to meet his warm, honey-colored eyes, making my heart thump loudly against my chest.

“Touma.. I forgive you.” 

**  
The next day, everyone’s obviously shocked and surprised to see me acting so different from the way I normally do once I went to work. Well, I couldn’t blame them. It was very strange, indeed, to see the normally stressed and sleep-deprived computer lady of the university looking so happy and energized. A huge smile is present on my face as I enter the office, where Koyuki-san is already starting his day. 

“Morning--- Woah!” He suddenly says as he raises his eyes to me from the computer. “You look so dashing today, miss!” 

“Oh shut up, you!” He suddenly stands from his seat while chuckling and coming closer to my desk as I sit down. He sits down on my desk as well, crossing his arms and then smirking.

“You know.. I would’ve asked you out on a date already if that guy isn’t giving me looks every time I’d come near you..” He chuckles again as he observes my appearance. I blushed under his scrutiny as I busy myself with my computer. ‘That guy’? and glaring at him? Who could’ve he meant? 

“Why don’t you go back to your desk and finish your work so I wouldn’t have to spend another minute trying to explain why I will never go out on a date with you.” 

“You’re so mean!” He pouts as he sticks his tongue out, causing me to laugh softly from behind and started with my work. My phone then suddenly buzzes as I was typing and I picked it up to answer the call. 

“Hey, you left a cup of coffee for me again..” Haru says as soon as I pick up the call and I a small smile tilts my lips at the sound of his voice. I’d always thought he was so nonchalant and cold, but as we spend time with each other, I found out that he was actually kind and caring. 

“Yeah. It’s just to show my thanks after you gave me that bento yesterday. That coffee’s delicious, anyway. It’s from my favorite coffee shop,” I briefly explained to him as I stared at my computer monitor. I could hear him sigh from the other line, probably because of the thought of how it has become an endless cycle for us to pay the other’s kindness. I figured out that we both pretty much hated indebting one another after a few times that we gave each other something in order to compensate. 

“Then let me treat you out to lunch today, like always,” he proposes, making me almost say yes until I remembered that Touma also asked me out for lunch today before he went back to his team yesterday when I saw him. 

“Uh.. Can I pass today? I can go eat lunch with you on every other day.. just not today, please?” He was silent for a while before I hear him sigh softly again—a sign that he wouldn’t even try to force nor convince me to join him for lunch. 

“Alright. Just make sure to not skip lunch.” He bids goodbye afterwards and then hangs up on the call. I smiled as I put my phone down, the thought of Touma’s smiling face etched on my mind. 

**  
Once the clock strikes to noon, all of the work that I currently have are put to a halt as I pick my purse up and head off to the University hallway where I’m supposed to meet Touma for lunch. A giddy smile is on my face—a sign that I am obviously excited to see him again. My heart was pounding fast against my chest, and I could feel warmth spreading across my cheeks by the mere thought of him. 

My smile grew wider as I see him at the end of the hallway and as soon as he sees me from afar, he looks at me with his warm smile and waves. 

“H-Hey..” I greeted him, looking at my feet suddenly as I push some strands of hair behind my ear. 

“Hey! Ready to go?” He asks, still with that same smile on his face which makes me feel warm all over. I nodded happily at him and walked alongside him as we made our way out of the campus to the nearby restaurant. 

“So.. You work here in the University, right? As.. a developer? A software engineer?” He asks as he looks at me while we were walking, effectively snapping me out of my thoughts as they slowly fill my mind. I shook my head before smiling and answering his question, “I’m an assistant in the network department. We mostly fix cables, connectivity, the internet and other network stuff around the University..” I caught myself before I could detail out more about my work. I sighed softly as I almost unleashed my inner nerd when I promised myself since last night that I wouldn’t want to look so uncool in front of him. 

“What? Why did you stop?” He asks suddenly, surprised to hear that he’s actually interested in me talking about my expertise. A shy smile suddenly tugs on my lips as I start to talk more about it. As we enter the restaurant and took our seats on a vacant table, the conversation eventually escalated to different things such as our lives and the things that have been happening around us lately. 

“So.. What do you want? It’s my treat so go on and order just as much as you’d like..” He smiles again, causing my heart to flutter inside my chest. Warmth spreads across my cheeks as I stared at him more before glancing down at the menu in an effort to hide my flustered state. 

“I’ll get a---“ 

“You’re here?” The familiar voice causes me to look up and saw the familiar man standing next to our table as he seems to be looking around for a vacant table as well. A tiny smile was on my lips as I looked at him and greeted him casually. 

“Hey! So you’re also eating here?” Being the usually-quiet guy he is, he simply nods at me in response. “So.. who are you with? Do you want to join us?” 

At the second question, he shakes his head in disagreement and looks at me with that usual expression on his face. “I’m with a friend,” He replies, and I nod at him. I suddenly felt guilt crawling up to my chest as I look at his blank expression for some reason. I observed the way how he looked at me, and then at Touma—who was also now looking back at him—their eyes clashing as if they were trying to communicate without words. Haru has this cold glare as he stares at Touma, while the latter keeps the smile on his face as he stands up and greet him. 

“Oh, hey! Nanase-kun! Nice to see you again!” Touma asks as he offers his hand to him for a friendly handshake. “It’s an honor to meet a fellow Olympic Gold medalist!” He happily says and despite his friendly and positive approach, Haru refused to take his hand and he switched his gaze back to me, before he turns on his heel and leaves. I blinked repeatedly as I stared at his back until he disappears within the crowd, making my brows furrow in slight confusion and annoyance.

“Ugh.. What is wrong with that man? I’m sorry that he has to be like that.. Maybe he’s having a bad day or something. He’s not usually like that.” I apologized in behalf of Haru as Touma takes his seat while I was ranting. He just chuckles in response and he reaches over to ruffle my hair gently. 

“I didn’t really mind.. I’ve even heard from everyone that he’s not the friendliest swimmer that you’d meet.” He shrugs as he looks at his phone for a moment before looking back at her. 

“So.. Um.. I actually have something to tell you today that’s why I invited you out for lunch,” he says as he bashfully rubs the back of his neck, a hint of blush appearing on his face as he speaks, making me wonder just what on earth is he going to say. Why is he even acting like he’s feeling so embarrassed?

“Go on. Tell me. Don’t worry about being judged or shamed,” I smiled as I prop my chin on my palm to show him that I am interested in what he’s about to say. The blush on his face only darkens as he looks down at his lap, obviously avoiding my gaze and it only makes him even more adorable than he already is. 

“I.. I-I.. I actually.. came back for you.” My eyes widens slightly at what he said. 

“What?”  
“It’s true! I know I sound like a liar right now.. But I really regretted leaving you before.” He takes my hand in between his hands as he holds it gently while I stared at him and listened to what he’s saying. 

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you while I was away.. training, joining competitions, winning. While I was an achiever, I feel like there’s a huge hole in my chest.. and only a few months ago that I start to realize that it was you who was missing in my life,” he gives my hand a gentle squeeze, his eyes displaying sincerity, and his voice was just as honest as his eyes. I could feel my heart beating so loudly, pounding fast against my chest as if it’s going to jump out. 

“T-Touma.. I-I---“ 

“I hope you could take me back into your life.. I couldn’t find real happiness despite having everything that I want.. Please..” He begs and I was suddenly at loss for words. My eyes were still wide, a tear rolling down as I nod at him, a wide smile adorning my lips. From having a worried expression, his face suddenly shows just how excited and happy he was with my response. 

 

“I still love you, Touma-kun.”


	8. Unloved

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello! I am still alive. 
> 
> Sorry this took too long! I'd been busy with work and is a bit stressed over things so it took me some time but here it is! Only 2 chapters to go before this ends and I actually have a concept now for a new Haru fic after this one. 
> 
> For now, enjoy this piece and I hope you like it!!

Haruka didn’t quite understand why on earth she’d get back to her ex whom she have cried over for years. 

It’s not like she willingly told him about it. In fact, she was drunk that one night when she called him to the bar and because he didn’t want her to screw herself up, he have decided to keep her company even if he knew that he had to wake up early the next day for his swim practice. He ended up sleep-deprived the next morning, but entirely glad that he brought her to her house safely after she cried over her ex until she passed out. And after his practice, he even came over to her place to check on her. 

He didn’t even quite understand why he was doing that for her, nor why he was even getting upset about seeing her being so in-love with her ex after he had dumped her, now that he’s back and told her he was sorry.

Haru slams his locker closed at the thought. He runs his fingers through his hair, making a clicking sound with his tongue as he leaves his startled teammates. As soon as he’s warmed up, he dives in the water in an attempt to make him forget about her even just for a while. The water, after all, is the one and only thing that could make him feel calm and at rest. 

But for some strange reason, it wasn’t able to give him that effect today. 

**

After his training, he gets up from the pool and heads to the locker to shower. He walks back in the locker room and was pulling some clothes on when he hears an annoying bunch of athletes come in. They stopped at the lockers behind his and he could clearly hear how they are all boasting about what they have-- women, money, fame..

“Yo and I heard Touma over here got back with his ex!” The voice was followed by a howl of laughter from the other guys as Haru suddenly felt like he needed to listen. Touma, wasn’t that the name of her boyfriend?

“Yeah I did.. but I only did it to make me look like the guy who left his gf for his dreams, but came back when he finally got it!” he proudly says, as pathetic as it was to Haru. He clenches his fist as he fights the urge to confront him and smack his face in behalf of her because she doesn’t deserve this. She had been nothing but sweet and kind, despite being stubborn sometimes and Haru wished she didn’t got back together with him. He silently wishes it’s just someone who really deserves her.. someone who would treat her right. 

Someone.. like him. 

“Oh man! What about your girlfriend, Kaoru? She’s coming over during your.joint practice with the nearby University, right?” Another one says, which infuriates Haru even further. Girlfriend? So she wasn’t the only one? And worse, (Name) might even be just that one girl he’d use to make his image as a star athlete look even better. 

“Yeah she’s coming over, but she won’t know anyway,” He shrugs before adding, “I like Kaoru better so I’m dumping (Name) after I fucked her and take away her virginity.” 

His eyes widens as the group cheers Touma on. If he wasn’t angry enough before, oh he was already very mad right now. He literally wanted to go to where they are now and teach this Touma a lesson for saying such thing about her. Instead, he just pulled his jersey on and walked out of the locker room to cool off his head. He has to keep calm if he doesn’t want her to get mad at him. 

Haru didn’t understand why Touma was treating her like shit. She doesn’t deserve such treatment. She was sweet, pretty, nice, funny, intelligent-- all of the good traits in a girl that every guy would look for in a potential girlfriend. The thought alone got Haru blushing, especially when he remembers about how Touma said that he wanted to take her virginity. Did that mean that she was a virgin when they made love that one fateful night? 

Whether it was him or someone else who took her innocence away, he was glad it wasn’t Touma. Though, he was honestly hoping that it was him, himself, who was able to do that. 

HIs whole face turns red as he jogs around the University. He shouldn’t be thinking this way too. 

Unless he likes her, of course. 

And looking into the situation, he is starting to fall for her already. 

He knew he had to save her from Touma, even if she ends up getting angry at him. 

**

(Name) was busily writing down some small notes in the letter that she wanted to give Touma the next day when she heard her doorbell repeatedly being rang, one evening. She stands up and wonders who’d even come to see her at this time. She walks to the front door, opening it for whoever and she smiles at the familiar face.

“Haru!” she says happily, making him feel like his heart skipped a beat. She was the only one who could make his name sound so beautiful, even though he initially hated it as it sounds girly. 

“Sorry to be coming over so late in the evening,” He says, rubbing the back of his neck shyly as he looks away for a moment before he brings his eyes back to her. He focuses on her innocent face- her soft and adorable features decorated with a very happy smile makes the butterflies in his stomach become worse. 

He knew he was falling for her… 

“I don’t mind the company! I actually needed you right now for some help! Come in, I made dinner!” She cheerfully says and he just finds himself being tugged in the apartment by her. He just really couldn’t say no to her no matter how many times he had told himself to try and resist her. He just loved seeing her smile, and he would be so damn upset if she gets her heart broken again. 

“I was actually writing a letter to Touma and it has to he perfect! I want it to be cute and romantic so I have to let you read it!” She smiles widely as she stopped in the kitchen and he felt his heart drop. A frown tugs on the corner of his lips and he deadpans. 

“I’m not a proofreader..” He says, clearly being jealous but he hoped that it wouldn’t show or she wouldn’t notice. Breaking their friendship would be the least he’d wanted to happen. 

“Eh… but you’re the only close male friend that I have!” And once again, he felt his heart flutter at her words. Even though she only sees him as a friend, he was glad that she acknowledges him that well. She cared for him more than any girl in his life did that even if she really finds her love in someone else that’s not him, it would be okay. So long as she’s happy. 

That Touma better back out from his plans, he thinks. 

She serves the dinner she had prepared and he takes a seat. A small smile manages to make its way to his lips as he inhaled the delicious aroma of food filling the kitchen. 

“So we should eat first before I make you read the letter. Don’t be shy to ask for seconds” 

He couldn’t help but smile at the delicious looking meal she prepared. She’d always been a good cook and he loved everything she had made. She takes a couple of papers from the counter as she sits down after serving their food, reading through them and smiling widely. 

“I’m just so happy he came back, Haruka. It was totally unexpected but he did. Ohhh maybe this is what they call true love!” she continues without even looking at him. At this point, Haru puts his chopsticks down as he was trying to figure out whether he should tell her or not immediately. She will have her heart broken the moment he tells her, but he also hated seeing her looking so happy while being tricked by her ex. He lets out a soft exhale as she continues to talk and swoon over him and Haru just couldn’t take it any longer. 

“_____, he’s cheating on you,” Haru says, his eyes on his food that only had a small dent as he prepared himself for what she has to say. She also stopped talking and silence then fills the room for a few seconds. 

“He’s not.. I-I… I believe in him, Haru. I’ve waited for this moment. Are you not happy for me?” She blinks as she couldn’t believe what she just heard him say. Touma wouldn’t cheat on her no matter what anyone says and not Haru can even change her mind. They’re in love and it’s just impossible.  
“N-No.. that’s not it. I heard him in the locker rooms.. talking about you.. in a bad way,” 

“he would never do that.. or say anything bad about me. Haru, I know you’re worried that he might be up to something since he returned and asked for a second chance.. but he’s not”

“You don’t understand,” He adds and shakes his head, his eyes serious as he stares at her, “If only you heard what he said earlier--”

“Stop this, Haruka! What is wrong with you?” She raises her voice as she slams her hands on the table as she gets up. She was already upset and the situation he was trying to avoid was already happening. He didn’t want to lose their friendship- it was the only thing keeping them close together since they can’t be more than that despite what he feels. She had never had romantic feelings for him. That night they had sex at the party was probably just something she did to forget about her problems while he fell for her hard. She will never fall in love with him, simply because her heart is already taken by a man who doesn’t even truly love her. 

He decides that there’s no point in fighting anymore. With a heavy sigh, he closes his eyes for a few seconds. 

“Sorry,” is all he said before he walks out of the kitchen. He takes his bag and goes to the door, but not leaving before saying, “If you need me, you know you can always call me…” 

He closes the door behind him and makes his way down to the ground floor. He runs his fingers through his hair once he starts to take his walk back home. He wasn’t able to do anything to save her. She refused to listen. He just hoped for Touma’s mind to change and for him to actually start loving her and treating her right 

So if she really loves him, that's fine. He just really wanted to see her happy even if he, himself, couldn't be the source of that happiness


End file.
